33 Apocalypse Ave, Friday Afternoon
Nov. 23rd, 2012 07:14 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
not_a_whinerJack was gone for Thanksgiving and Kaidan didn't really have any classes to teach - or any preparation to put into them. He had an empty house and no real work to pour himself into; his parents had celebrated Thanksgiving over a month ago, and...
Well, Allie was probably still around, since she couldn't leave. But she was outside, and going outside was a feat Kaidan couldn't drive himself to accomplish, somehow. He just... sat around. Alone. With his thoughts.
It wasn't a winning combination.
He hadn't really been genuinely alone since the first week here. Had forgotten what it was like when he didn't have something to keep him occupied (or make slightly pointed remarks about him going outside and talking to people). He roamed around the house - TV? No, he didn't feel like it - picking things up and putting them back down.
Sometimes pictures. ... A lot of times, pictures.
Eventually he wound up in his room, staring at them. Feeling stupid, ridiculous for obsessing. Feeling a lot like there was a hole in the world he'd been trying to cover up and it wasn't working. Like his room was too big and the silence too loud and he wanted to crawl into bed and use the blankets to blot it all out.
He wasn't a kid, though. Couldn't do that. Except... he had nothing else to do.
He sighed and threw the pad with the latest snapshot - Shepard, alone - back onto his nightstand, then collapsed back onto his bed. No responsibilities, right?
Felt like hell.
Couple minutes later, the call came in from Hackett, telling him to grab a portal to Alliance Command that night for a mission. Call Kaidan stupid, call him crazy, but the idea of going out into hostile territory and fixing something for a change-- well, it was a life raft he was going to grab onto with both hands before he drove himself crazy.
He yanked the blanket off of his head.
[[ mostly establishy but can be open, la. ]]
Well, Allie was probably still around, since she couldn't leave. But she was outside, and going outside was a feat Kaidan couldn't drive himself to accomplish, somehow. He just... sat around. Alone. With his thoughts.
It wasn't a winning combination.
He hadn't really been genuinely alone since the first week here. Had forgotten what it was like when he didn't have something to keep him occupied (or make slightly pointed remarks about him going outside and talking to people). He roamed around the house - TV? No, he didn't feel like it - picking things up and putting them back down.
Sometimes pictures. ... A lot of times, pictures.
Eventually he wound up in his room, staring at them. Feeling stupid, ridiculous for obsessing. Feeling a lot like there was a hole in the world he'd been trying to cover up and it wasn't working. Like his room was too big and the silence too loud and he wanted to crawl into bed and use the blankets to blot it all out.
He wasn't a kid, though. Couldn't do that. Except... he had nothing else to do.
He sighed and threw the pad with the latest snapshot - Shepard, alone - back onto his nightstand, then collapsed back onto his bed. No responsibilities, right?
Felt like hell.
Couple minutes later, the call came in from Hackett, telling him to grab a portal to Alliance Command that night for a mission. Call Kaidan stupid, call him crazy, but the idea of going out into hostile territory and fixing something for a change-- well, it was a life raft he was going to grab onto with both hands before he drove himself crazy.
He yanked the blanket off of his head.
[[ mostly establishy but can be open, la. ]]
